I have thoughts of refusing to "give her away". When the minister says " Who gives this woman to be married?" I have imagined saying "Um, excuse me but I've thought it over & since I waited MANY years to even HAVE a "daughter", I want to keep her ! " I mean, what's the worse that could happen anyway? Nervous laughter, giggles ,,,, until they realized that I am not laughing ? Of course I would be torn asunder between the Bride and her Mother ,,, but then again, all those people gathered, just hold my funeral & get it over with.
Oh it's lunacy I know, but a part of me [ not a small part btw ] really does not want to give Sarah away ,,,, that which took so long to obtain must now be given away. So, since I can feel my heart starting to break even now [ again, not in a little way ... ] I have decided I must concentrate on the times that she was less than "perfect". The times when I KNEW she must be acting like her Mother or her real Dad's family, as MY contributions to her raising were not in evidence. And there HAVE been a few of those moments in the last 17 years or so ; - )
I have actually come to like the young man that I am "giving" her to,,,something that did not happen overnight. Due to some past history I did not trust David right away. [ Said history was nothing that he did btw. ] Over time he has made me laugh [ always a good thing ] , stood by Sarah in her most trying times and most importantly ,,, he has convinced my heart that his heart truly loves her. They are building a life together ,,, and it's time to let her go ,,, time to give her away.
So this coming Saturday, some fifty hours from now, I will walk her down the isle of that church, her all dressed in fluffy white, as gorgeous as she's ever been .... and I will "give away'"that which was never really mine to begin with. I just wanted to think she was mine, for a while, for just a little while. I will utter the words that must be uttered and place Sarah's hand into David's hand. Then I will sit down and see how good this old Director's acting skills really are ,,, I will hold a look of dignity and reserve ,,, while inside I will be struggling to ,,,,,,,
" KEEP A SONG IN MY HEART "
~ I Love You Sarah Elizabeth ~
~ Now and Always ~